Francis Bacon With A Twist

God wrote two books, one you read and the other you see.

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Tallest Tree

There is no Christmas tree taller than the one reflected in the eyes of a one year old.

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Christmas Mystery

It's been many, many years since Christ was part of Christmas in our public schools. I wonder what a teacher says to a small child when asked, "Why is it called Christmas?" I'm quite sure many of them honestly answer, "I really don't know."

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Seasonal Symptoms

I get a headache, then begin shallow breathing, which leads to bleeding from my ears, and culminates with convulsions just thinking about stings of tangled Christmas tree lights.

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Political Percentages

It is easy to define politicians if you use percentages.

DEMOCRAT: Someone who is 51% arrogant and 49% greedy.
REPUBLICAN: Someone who is 49% arrogant and 51% greedy.
INDEPENDENT: Someone who is 50% arrogant and 50% greedy.

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Almost Perfect

I am but one fault away from being perfect. I am a sinner.

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Wedding Cake

Someone once said that the most dangerous food is wedding cake. I had me a big piece of wedding cake about 43 years ago and I ain't dead yet.

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Foolproof Directions

Three lefts make a right and three rights make a left.

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Between A Rock And A Hard Place

Arrogance on the left, greed on the right, and the rest of us caught in the middle.

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Healthy Common Sense

"No law shall be passed that restricts a person's freedom of choice of private health care systems or private plans of any type. No law shall interfere with a person's or entity's right to pay directly for lawful medical services, nor shall any law impose a penalty or fine, of any type, for choosing to obtain or decline health care coverage or for participation in any particular health care system or plan."

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Great Adventures

Truly great adventures are the ones you never forget. They may be short, or they may be long. They may make you laugh, or they may make you cry. And when they are over you just can't wait to tell everyone about it and then go do it again.
Come to think of it, Sunday sermons at our church are like that.

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Never Upside Down

It seems like everytime you turn around these days the world is upside down because of some crisis, calamity or catastrophy. Good thing when God created the heavens and earth he also created gravity.

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Consensus Is Not Science

If consensus were science, our world would still be flat.

http://holycoast.blogspot.com/2009/11/science-doesnt-support-current-global.html

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Dead Horse

The fool grabs a stick and beats a dead horse.
The wise man grabs a shovel and buries it.

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Thinking

"Five percent of the people think;
ten percent of the people think they think; and the other eighty-five percent would rather die than think."
— Thomas A. Edison

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Death of Liberty

When liberty dies, it is more often from the silence than from the gun.

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50/50

Basically, we have a two party system for electing our public officials. So when we go into the voting booth to vote it's a fifty-fifty proposition...fifty percent worthless and fifty percent useless.

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The Aging of Time

When I was young, yesterday was yesterday and tomorrow was tomorrow. Now I'm over sixty and tomorrow was yesterday.

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Competency

I'd rather be a competent nobody than an incompetent somebody.

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Admiration

Who do you admire?
The person who says, "I cannot tell a lie".
Or the person who says, "I won't tell a lie".
Beware of the arrogant, for we are all sinners.
Admire the person who says, "I'll try not to".

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